words escape me

tmz.com

While not dating, Ann Coulter and Jimmie "JJ" Walker were each others date for the 5th Annual TV Land Awards. (Insert your own DYNO-MITE joke here.)

I am not quite sure what to say. I think this picture says it all.

(Although didn't Ms. Coulter accuse the 9/11 widows of being publicity mongers? Pot, meet Kettle.)

thank god for hef

Courtesy The Age; article here

Hugh Hefner has announced a triple-whammy of Anna Nicole Smith tributes: in the May issue of Playboy, on Playboy TV, and at playboy.com.

I love it! A return to Anna Nicole's glory days! Anna Nicole, '93 Playmate of the Year! This is the way she ought to be remembered.

(via bunnyshop; post here)

missing the old britney

A friend recently reminded me of the 2001 MTV VMAs, in which Britney performed "I'm a Slave 4 U" with the lion and snake. And watching it again ... what happened? Remember when Britney was the standard by which to measure all fabulous, extravagant, professional performers? Look at her strutting around and carrying the whole damn show by herself. You can't take your eyes off her. We don't have anyone who pushes the envelope like that anymore, especially now that Xtina is all '40s glam. Probably no one can ever live up to the Britney of '01, not even Britney herself.

(thx, liza)

thought for the day

Bart: According to creationism, there were no cavemen.

Homer: Good riddance. Their drawings suck and they look like hippies.

the hills are alive

I didn't watch Laguna Beach but I am in love with The Hills. I especially love to hate Spencer Pratt, the Ken Doll dating Heidi. I swear, if you took off his pants he would have plastic underwear molded to his crotch.

Exhibit A:

However, this article made me hate

a) Spencer Pratt and Brody Jenner

AND

b) me, for reading the article and realizing how disgusting these people are. And then blogging about it.

Look at that stupid, sly smile on his face. Look at his obnoxiously big, white teeth. I just want to punch him in the mouth and run away yelling, "neigh! neigh!" Why do I want to do this? Obviously, I have anger issues towards Spence and I feel the need to remind him that he looks like a horse.

Stupid Ken doll.

more on britney's breakdown

(via dooce)

On Monday Craig Ferguson did a great segment on his battle with alcoholism and how he sees his own alcoholic behavior in Britney. If you've got twelve and a half minutes to spare, it's more than worth watching.

things i don't understand

Alan Thicke standing in a pool (with his pants on), urging me to go to Las Vegas. It's a commercial on the CW that airs late at night.

I like Las Vegas. I like(d) Growing Pains (especially the one where Matthew Perry was killed in a drunk driving accident). But both of them together?